Many of you do not know this . . . but I am married . . . I was married young and I am still the age of many college students . . . but marriage and living in the real world has taught me more than I ever learned from school. I really believe that I have a distinct and unique perspective on life in America and the Christian culture here . . . . because I believe I have been on both sides of the fence . . . in a way. I have been on the skeptical side of the fence for many years . . . I have been on the doubting side of the fence . . . I have been on the moral and "sophisticated" side of the fence . . . or more like 'moral and successful' side . . . . I have been on the side of the street where girls and boys grow up in gangs and with the only they . . . and even I could seem to get back at the world was to lash out with words . . or with raw emotional physical destruction . . . . but nothing can ever really take the pain away from not only having no family . . . but also growing up in a violent, abusive, and many times life threatening environment . . . . . and . . . I have also grown up with the thought that I did not understand why it was so hard to believe in God . . . or wondering what it was even like to have a spiritual renewal experience of my very own.
Well sometimes things happen . . . and GOD happens . . . when you least expect it . . . and just like as in the story with the footprints . . . you suddenly look back . . and you are amazed at the wonders God has performed in your life when you didn't even realize it.
AT this time . . . right after Christmas . . . and the new year 2010 already begun . . . I think about all my Atheistic friends . . . I think about my emotionally torn past . . . and I think about my parents . . . not even knowing if they are even saved . . . I worry more than anything about whether I can help the people closest to me to learn about Jesus and be saved . . . I mean who knows? . . . The second coming could be any day now . . . . and STILL people come to my site just to mock me . . . Seriously I am more saddened for them than for any personal attacks they make towards me. Nothing can be worse than Hell . . . nothing . . . .
And at this time . . . I also have doubts . . . like what am I even doing anymore . . . where my life is going . . . so many times I have even asked myself if I am kidding myself about this 'God thing' knowing that my parents told me themselves they thought I was crazy . . .
It's weird that the one thing that makes MY life complete . . . is the one thing that separates me from the majority of people on the planet . . . the majority of whom are not Christians . . . do not take the question of the afterlife seriously, do not think about consequences or purpose to what is going on in their lives at this exact moment . . . All they can think about is how their life choices will effect their personal comfort . . . and THAT is what is accepted in society right now . . . and I'm sure has been accepted for a long long time . . . .
The holidays are very rough on me . . . so I ask that anyone reading this would PLEASE keep me in prayer . . . I am not good at asking this to people face to face right now . . . So I will leave it in God's hands . . . that whoever reads this post and decides to pray for me . . . . I'm sure that is just the right person I need to pray for me . . . .
You see . . . my marriage to a believing and professing Christian has caused a rift between me and my former friends and family . . . and it has saved me from an abusive environment . . . Somehow . . .I believe that whether or not I am able to help close this rift . . the least I can do is try to help close the rift between Christians and Atheists here in America and around the world . .. especially those that I relate to . . . those who still have the most hope and window of opportunity to come to understand each other . . . the youth of our generation.
And so I can only pray that someone will reach my own family and friends . .. but at the moment I cannot . . and I am not emotionally able to . . . It has been killing me inside . . . But I'm going to have to leave it in God's hands . . and perhaps I will help reach someone reach a member of someone else's family that no one else could reach.
The reason I believe so strongly in talking about Creation Science . . . is because . . Science is like a god to this world to Secularists and Atheists . . . and science is something people know to be good and helpful . . . science is something people can relate to . . . If we can take this jumping off point and run with it . . . just like Paul did with the 'unknown god' with the Greeks . .. perhaps we can reach some people with the truth that has saved us . . . the Saving faith in Jesus Christ our Lord.